Let Go of the Drama. (A cheap post)
[Sometimes I think it's cheap to post other peoples stuff in place of my own thoughts...but I'm making an exception to that rule. At least for today.]
My best friend sent me this today. I love it because I find myself getting sucked into petty dramas lately. They have little do with the the direction of my life…yet they do because I pay attention to them at the expense of my current happiness. It’s another one of those subtle paradoxes we all live with.
Not sure how to punctuate this next part…but WTH?
You know what I’m talking about, right? Defending ourselves against half-truths (the truth comes out in the end anyway so why work so hard to convince people otherwise?)…discussions about “what I would do if that was me,” (it’s not…so knock it off)…jealousies for what others have and fears about what we might lose. (It’s probably best to look at what we DO have and treasure them while we have them. It’s tough to be jealous when you feel so lucky.)
Anyhow…I love this little thing because slowly but surely I’m able to find some of the humor I left behind when more intense dramas were a part of our lives. It’s a different kind of intensity now…living with the absence of someone who was such a big part of our lives…but what I know now is that life unrolls the way does…much of it in our control…more of it not.
We have immense control over who we surround ourselves with. I’m going with the laughers because it’s true…life is very, very short. So just like this bit of wisdom suggests…find yourself some laughers…and keep them close. They are the one’s who “get it” and they will make our life here better. (The funny thing is they don’t even have to try. I love that about them.)
Andy,
I just have to share the little miracle that came my way the other day. My son passed away Dec 2008, from a long fight with a variety of diseases caused from a complicated heart defect. We had faced many challenges and fought a valiant war.
About 7 years ago, Austin was suffering from a little know disease called “plastic brochitis”. At the time there were only three diagnosed patients, all of which passed away in a relatively short period of time. Austin was following the same path and we were told that he had less than a month to live. We went home, to care for him the best we could.
While a hospice counselor was visiting one day, a interesting conversation began. Although she was there to counsel me, in dealing with the eventual lose of my son, she was also willing to think a little out side of the box. Knowing full well that she was only a counselor and not a doctor, she wondered aloud if Austin’s disease was not like cystic fibrosis, and if some of the treatments my help him. I immediately called the doctors, who at first rejected the theory. I continued to push, and took it to his other doctors as well. They decided it was worth a try, because it was non invasive and could not hurt him. Our insurance thought otherwise. Together we worked on it, until we got the supplier of the Vest Clearance System on board. Hilrom agreed to loan us their equipment, as a medical experiment.
It worked, Austin not only got better, but the disease was almost completely cleared from his lungs! Hilrom now lists the Vest Clearance System as a therapy for Plastic Bronchitis.
It made me think about this woman (who I can’t even remember her name). She was in our lifes for just a few short weeks, visiting us 2 or 3 times. But the impact she made on our life’s was an incredible gift, a gift that is now working in other people’s life’s as well. She left the company shortly after our visits, and I was never able to tell her that her idea had not only worked, but saved Austin’s life.
All because she took the time to think about our situation, dig into her own experiences and knowledge, came up with some similarities, and shared some thoughts – and look what came of it.
As I thought of her, I thought of others that have impacted my life in some really lasting way, even if they were in my life for a very short time. I was amazed at how many there have been.
What a cool story, Lori. (That rhymes
) We had a bunch of those as well…but not nearly as dramatic. What I mean is we had nameless nurses, people at the reception desk, or in waiting rooms who made those times less rotten. Makes you wonder if we didn’t attract ourselves to each other because they always seemed to be there when we really needed them. And they still are…wow.
Thanks so much for the comment! (I’m not proud of how I wrote this one…so it’s extra-apprectiated!)
Hi Andy, forgive me for being away for so long! I have not been able to keep up with blogs as well since I am working again. Just read quite a few of the posts you’ve written recently. I am happy for you, because you are happy, and you are ALLOWED to be happy, there are no “rules”.
I had the same quote on my blog not long ago, they are words to live by.
Hi Barbara…
I haven’t been on as much as I used to either. This is a quote that makes me smack my head and think, “No kidding. It’s so simple.” And it is I think. Then again…we think a lot don’t we…and then we forget these simple ways of approaching life. Thanks for the note…and for agreeing with me that I’m allowed to be happy.
Hi andy, i had just seen your story on tmj4, i can relate, i lost my wife aug 2008, she was constantly hospitalized with many health issues since we got married in 98, we adopted a baby girl in 03, the luv of my life…..then i lost my father 4 months later, and without the support of family and friends….i dont know what i would have done, i will definately check out your book! thanks, and god-bless!