[I was looking at some files on our old computer and found something I wrote about 2 years ago.  It reminded me why I started Thirty Seconds in the first place.  So...if you've ever wondered...well...here you go.  As usual...unedited.  I think it would take away from what I was feeling at the time...even though it's a bit sketchy.  I love finding old stuff...even if it is dark sometimes.]

Thirty Seconds…

Thirty Seconds is nothing more than a little theory I developed in the wake of my wife’s cancer diagnosis.  There is no scientific basis for this theory…that when our time here is up our lives will seem like they were about :30 seconds long.  I have no research on the dying to report accurately if this is true.  It’s not about brain functions, or medical transcripts, or psychological treatises on the subject.  It’s none of that.  It’s from my own little brain…as I look back at everything that has happened in my life so far and realize it was all one big cosmic blink.

It comes from my own struggles…as I try to understand the reality of death.  Not just Laura’s death…but my own.  And not just my death…but my children’s.  And not just theirs…but yours as well.  I hate to break this to you…but you’re going to die.

OK…whoa.  Back up Cowboy!

Pretty uplifting, huh?  It’s true though and I like to use it to get off the mark and move forward in the face of some sad sh*t.

If you’re healthy this statement…that you’re going to die…comes as no surprise.  In fact…you can utter it with a bit of bravado because let’s face it…the chances of it happening anytime soon are remote.  It’s about as threatening as talking with your friends about what it’s going to be like when you’re old.  I guess if you’re lucky you will get old.  (And then you’ll bitch about it.)  If you’re not lucky…well…then you won’t get old.  It doesn’t matter much in the end because when your number is up you’ll have to go.

I don’t intend to regurgitate the overused almost quaint euphemisms about death and dying.  Sayings that challenge us to live like we’re dying…stuff like that.  It’s easy to visit that spot once in a while…but none of us stay there very long because it’s too scary.

It seems to me most of us live our lives as if dying is for other people.  We might do well to understand that we don’t have all that much time here and we better stop waiting for things to  happen to us.  That’s the :30 Seconds thing…start making it happen NOW…because our time here is very short.

So…

So start living your :30 Seconds no matter what’s happening in your life and do it right now.  Don’t try to do it…because there is no in between.  You’re either making things happen or you’re not.  I know…you have roadblocks and brick walls and things only you have to deal with…but doesn’t the thought of conquering those things sort of spur you on?  I hope it does because you only have :30 seconds and the clock is ticking.  I think it’s time to start seizing these days…don’t you?